


Nightmares

by TheGhoti



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Avengers Tower, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, How Do I Tag, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Reader-Insert, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, enjoy, the rest of the avengers are just mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-06 10:42:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25968343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGhoti/pseuds/TheGhoti
Summary: You are stuck behind from a team mission and find you self at the Tower alone with Bucky, still recovering from years of dangerous programing from Hydra.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Reader
Kudos: 7





	Nightmares

**Author's Note:**

> Ahhh. I wrote this instead of sleeping. I haven't edited it yet, so fair warning. 
> 
> This is my first piece of published fanfiction, so tips, pointers etc. are welcome! I also don't have any idea how ratings apply sooo... I think I did this right?
> 
> I love Bucky as a character and I this Sebastian portrays his broken character so well. This doesn't really happen anywhere specific in the timeline. After Bucky gets free of Hydra and after the accords. 
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy and I'd love to hear what people think in the comments!
> 
> Edit: Bad news already, I can't spell ; )

The tower was cold tonight. With everyone gone it felt empty, well, almost everyone. 

Fury had called for the team ten hours ago, and as a not-yet-sanctioned-member of the Avengers, there was no way I could help. That’s what I had complained, in detail, to Steve about as they were suiting up and leaving.

_ \---------- _

_ “Steve, are you sure I couldn’t just tag along? You guys might need backup. What if you’re in trouble?” _

_ “I’ll have the rest of the Avengers there with me Y/N. You really don’t need to worry.” I sighed. “Besides, Bucky’s not coming either and I’d feel better if someone stayed with him. He’s still…” _

_ Steve made a gesture to nothing in particular.  _

_ “Figuring stuff out?” I tried. Steve gave me a thankful look. _

_ “It’s a real shock, the programing being gone for the first time in years.” _

_ “I know, I know. I just can’t wait for Fury to give me the go ahead so I can come with you guys.” _

_ \---------- _

They had left and I had stayed. The UN said it was something about “protocall.” Screw protocall, I was no use on the bench. My mind liked to remind me of that.

Walking around the tower at night was weird. I had been here for months, but everytime I rounded a corner it was like a new table had appeared. For all I know, it could be Tony messing with me. I bet Natasha was in on it too. 

That aside, it was also quite peaceful. It was safe, Jarvis made sure of that, and it was home. 

One place I had memorized when I first arrived was the kitchen. It hardly changed. Steve and Clint kept it stocked and the rest of us were thankful. I’m glad that wasn’t Tony’s job, with the state of his private living space, we’d have all starved by now. Nothing is ever in order.

Walking from the kitchen to my room took me about as far as I would ever go on the average day, save the training room downstairs. The group as a whole discouraged me from leaving the tower too much, the UN hadn’t deemed me “safe” yet.

On my trek back to my room with a cup of tea in hand I walked past Bucky’s door. Steve had said I should check on him and I hadn’t Barnes since they left. In fact, I couldn’t remember seeing him in the last couple days.  _ “I wonder if he’s changed.”  _ My brain added jokingly. 

Bucky didn’t seem to leave his room much, I guess he liked his privacy. But what Steve says, goes. So I knocked on the door. It was late so I wasn’t expecting a response. At least I wasn’t disappointed when there was no response from the other side. I walked away to set my tea down on the table a few steps past his door. It was getting too hot to hold.

I knocked on his door one more time. Respect his privacy or fulfil Steve’s request. Sorry Bucky, Steve takes priority.  _ “Blame him not meeeeeeee.”  _

I twisted the handle quietly and pushed the door open. It was dark.  _ “He’s probably sleeping. I shouldn’t wake him up. Let the soldier get his beauty sleep.” _

I had just decided to try again in the morning  _ (“Steve said they might be gone for a couple days. Eight more hours won’t hurt.”)  _ when I heard him stir. “James?” I whispered into the darkness.

There was no reply, but I did hear him… whimpering?

I stepped in and closed the door behind me. I should check on him, of all people I know nightmares can suck. After joining the Avengers, my most recent ones have been Nat getting hurt, Clint being mind-controlled again, the list goes on and on and it only gets worse from there. 

There was enough light from the closed blinds on the other side of the room that I could make my way across the floor without tripping. I walked further down the hall until it opened out. 

I had been worried about tripping? Almost not possible here. His room was surprisingly neat. Steve’s was even slightly more lived in looking.  _ “I guess this is a trend amongst soldiers?”  _

It felt like a hotel room. Stark ( _ “Ha, no pun intended” _ ) and unlived in. I suddenly felt a wave of pity crash over me.  _ “I wonder if he doesn’t think he’ll be allowed to stay.”  _ The thought made me shiver. Bucky wasn’t the friendliest at first, but if anyone deserved a safe place, it was him.

My attention shifted over to the bed as I heard some tossing and turning. And more whimpering.

And then there was a voice in the darkness. 

“пожалуйста... остановись.” It was Russian, I could tell. I had no idea what he said, but the tone, his voice, said everything. He was pleading, that much was obvious. I felt another pang akin to sorrow. 

I had to wake him up, who knows what he was dreaming about.  _ “Not dreams, nightmares.”  _

I moved over to his bed. Getting a better look at him, I felt terrible. He looked like he had been crying, his face was tear stained and terrified. 

I put a hand to his shoulder. It was cold and I worried for a moment before I remembered that it was metal, of course it was cold. 

“James, you have to wake up.” I was met with more whimpering and a cry of pain. I flinched back, assuming I had done something wrong, but me backing away did nothing to change his threatened demeanor. 

I moved back up to him. “Bucky, wake up!” I tried to stay calm but his panicked aura did nothing to help with my cool. I tried one more time, my voice a hurried whisper.

That must have done the trick. His eyes flew open. His reaction was so fast, so calculated in so little time, that I was completely thrown off my guard. I found myself pinned against the wall with a metal hand wrapped around my throat before I could say a word of protest. 

“почему они не оставят тебя в покое!” He punctuated every word with his grasp constricting ever more. 

It wasn’t like I could respond. I didn’t know Russian and my neck was being held with enough force it threatened to snap.

But his eyes weren’t focused, not on me or anything else. All there was was a mix of rage, hate, and fear. 

“B-Buck... Ple-ease!” 

Time seemed to drag on, but it couldn’t have taken longer than a few seconds, I would have been dead otherwise, but the glint of murderous hatred faded from his eyes and they were left with one emotion. 

Fear. 

He released me and I fell to the floor, gasping for air. “Th-Thanks” I managed to get out. After a moment or two I looked up, Bucky looked horrified.

He bent down quickly to reach my level as I was panting on the floor. The quick movement from my attacker made me flinch back to the wall.

He broke the stunned silence first. “I-I’m so sorry…” All I could do was sniffle and nod. “I’m sorry that I hurt you. I-I can hardly control it, but I should be able to.” He began to get back up slowly. “All I can do is harm.” I hear him berate himself.

When I managed to get up I found him standing over his nightstand, and I heard him crying. To the transformation of full Winter Soldier to ashamed Bucky is startling enough, not even mentioning the fact the he went full assassin on me. 

“I’m sorry I woke you up,” I stutter out. I can’t think of what else to say. It’s ok? No, it’s not, I almost died. 

So I leave. I close the door behind me. I probably shouldn’t leave the old Winter Soldier to his own devices after I left and he looked ready to hurt himself, but there is nothing I can do shake the image of the deep-set, burning rage in his eyes.

I run to my room and lock the door. Standing against it for a moment I manage to calm myself down. I’m fine, I’m alive, I’ll deal with conversation in the morning.

I quickly get ready to get in bed. When I’m nestled beneath my covers my last thought to cross my mind is 

_ “I left my tea in the hall.” _

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed and I'd love to hear what people think in the comments!


End file.
